Metal Emotions

I've just been feeling really cruddy all day.

Tampering With The Natural Order Of Things? Metal.

It would be just my luck, to create a Monster and end up using the brain of a chav.

Mike Mignola is Metal

I would love to be able to go and have Mike Mignola throw skulls at me.

Housework Is So Not Metal

The fruit of Ben's strange union with Satan.

Metal Costumes

My costumes are never that cool.

Metal Beverages

Allyn isn't very metal, bless him.

Cat. Metal. Cat.

This is my cat, Pumpkin. He's calmed down a bit since having his bollocks removed. But not much.

Metal Swimming

I'm not much of a swimmer. But when I do swim, I do it in style.

Metal Imagination

Imaginary friends: not always gay.

Robots Aren't Always Metal

I'm not much of an engineer. Or programmer. In fact machines generally hate me.

Guitar Hero II: Metal

Videogames can be bad for you, but not in the way people usually think.

Metal Shopping

Just because you ride in someone's side car, does not make you their bitch. Stupid Garden State.

The Adventures of Metal Bob #2

The only problem with being so metal is, things often spontaneously catch fire.

The Adventures of Metal Bob #1

Bob is metal. He has to deal with all kinds of shit at work.

The Metal of Slayer

I saw Slayer once. Fell asleep down the front for a bit. And that's not a joke.

Fire = Metal

I do love my booze.

Death Metal

When the Reaper comes for me, the Reaper gets fucked.

Metal Thor

Yeah, that's right - Thor is a pussy.

Metal Costume

I actually did that one time. Didn't hurt.

Metal Guitar

This would be a fucking awesome guitar.